Tiny

I grasped as my friend told me over email that she was expecting. My heart sat in my throat as I thought back to the first day we met. 

She was 18 and had moved to the Big City with her best friend, to study. 

I love her like a little sister. I worry about her like a big sister would.  

She is having a little girl.  A little tiny human, which will eventually grow up to be a fully-grown human. 

I got teary eyed when she messaged me with the news that they could see the brain, the spinal cord, intestines and the three veins feeding her., in the last scan.  A miracle.

A little tiny miracle, so beautifully woven together.  And since I just jpassed High school Biology, I cannot remember all the ins &outs, but I remember even at 17 being amazed at how many things come into play with a pregnancy.

Its at a time like this that I cannot help but believe in God. 

My God creates life the size of a bean.

The one you’ll never forget

You know those days that just. won’t. end. 

Those days that seems like a waste of energy, make up, effort and normally results in a glass of wine.  Or wanting to climb back into bed.  I had one of those weeks, except I don’t have wine, cannot vent to anybody and found the situation just getting worse despite my best efforts.   And yet, within the madness, the crazy working days and relentless heat I found a little moment of kindness.

The first one I remember happened in Swaziland.  I had taken the weekend off to meet friends in Swaziland and crossed the border just before dark that night.  Being in a strange country, I got lost and finally pulled off the road to get my bearings while sitting with the map on my lap.  A pickup pulled over just behind me, a lady jumped off, running to ask me if I’m ok and if she can help… Actually, I just drove past the turn-off, she directed me and watched until she saw me reach my hostel.

Such a simple gesture, and yet at that point, meant the world to me. I’d been driving for five hours. It was my first weekend off in seven months and I was still trying to deal with the death of my father. 

Yesterday I found a strange gesture of kindness in the mad city of Delhi. Don’t get me wrong – I like cities, I like the vibe, the lifelines of it all and the dreams people come to cities with.  Delhi, however, is another story – pretty amazing, but you have to spend some getting to understand it.

After the shoot, I made my way outside to find an auto.  It’s 11 at night, the time everybody warned me against. Everybody: my flat mate, my landlord, colleagues, friends – everybody warned to take care at night. Not to go out after 10pm and if so, not to travel alone.  Delhi, unfortunately does come with a reputation.

The camera crew was 5min behind me and finally helped me find an auto.  There is a weird relationship within a crew – we trust each other with our lives.  While they are busy discussing it, a couple asked me whether I knew them and if I need help.  Kind, but firm.  Clearly knowing the reputation the city has and how it feels to be new in a city. 

I smiled, I’ve been here seven weeks.  It’s the one I’ll never forget.